Introduction

The Chinese culture has always been an interest to me, everything from food to annual festivals. One of the most fascinating things about the Chinese culture is their traditional marriage custom brought forward from 2,000 years ago. Although most of these traditions have been faded out because of its irrelevancy to today's society, some rituals have made its way into modern society.

Most of the traditional marriage customs had changed as time changed. The technological advances and industrialization of the world altered these traditions to conform to the contemporary world. My research will define these traditional marriage customs and rituals of the Chinese culture, and track their changes from the past to the present. Identifying the ways Chinese people preserve their culture while living in a modern time.

Traditional Marital Customs and Rituals

When the idea of marriage comes up in today's society, we relate this term with love, serious relationship, the holy bond between a man and a woman, etc, but back in ancient China the idea of free love is more of a taboo. In the traditional scheme of things romantic love was rarely the motive for marriage in China. Most marriage is arranged between the parents of the bride and groom. For example, two best friends, one has a girl and the other a boy, can arrange a marriage before the child was even born. Other means of arrangement can be by a professional marriage broker, or matchmaker, based on the family's background and social status.

In this case, it is not usual for the bride and groom to meet for the first time on their wedding day. Traditionally, the daughters of elite families in China are kept inside the household, rarely seen but anyone from the outside. Therefore, meeting a prospective husband is quite difficult for a woman. The decision of marriage is totally made by the parents. The results of this tradition often end up tragically because people end up marrying someone they don't want to and do not care about for their entire life.

Road to Wedding Day

Traditionally, after the parents of the bride and groom has agreed to the marriage arrangement based on the compatibility of their astrological signs, birth dates, and family backgrounds, the actual wedding planning can begin.

The families will consult the Chinese almanac for an auspicious wedding date and then consult a fortune teller to see if the date and time of the wedding will bring fortune to the couple and family. Once the date is set, the place can be determined by the family. Usually in a wedding between prosperous families, the wedding ceremony is held in the groom's house. It is considered one of the most important days for the groom's family, so all of the family's relatives, friends, employees, and even villagers can be invited to this big day. Invitations for the wedding are sent out in a red envelope with gold writing.

On the bride's side, the family will have to get the bride's dowry ready to be delivered to the groom's home. This dowry often includes a Chinese hope chest containing domestic linens and bedding such as silk comforter and matching pillowcases bundled together with a strip of red good luck paper. A set of dinnerware, complete with serving platters, soup tureens, a tea set, and chopsticks, is also packed into the dowry. In additional to furnishing, a monetary gift is enclosed to purchase other things for the new home. The final item in the dowry is a Chinese lacquered tray, known as the Good Fortune Tray, filled with lychees, longans, peanuts, dried red dates, and sweets such as sugared coconut, melon, lotus seeds, and ginger. This tray symbolizes good fortune to the future couple. All these possessions will be delivered the groom's house three days prior to the wedding day.

Source: http://www.1001chineseweddinginvitations.com/images/chinese_invitation.jpg; http://www.chinapictures.org/photo/people-life/chinese-wedding/40722180102101/

Wedding Attire

The bride's wedding attire is a Chinese trousseau, traditionally, a red silk hong qua wedding suit with silver and gold threads. The hong qua, meaning “red suit,” has been considered the Chinese wedding gown since its creation for the imperial family in the Yuan dynasty (1279-1368 C.E.). This traditional wedding suit is an intricately embroidered jacket of phoenixes and dragons-the symbol of the bride and groom-and a long pleated red silk skirt embroidered with flowers. To complete the ensemble, an elaborate headpiece with red pom-poms and tassels-a Chinese counterpart to the veil-is worn with the hong qua.
The groom's wedding attire is not as flashy as the bride's. The traditional Chinese gentlemen's robe is created with a subtle pattern on dark silk. A long red sash is draped over the shoulder and tied at the waist. A round black hat with a red tassel completes the groom's traditional wedding attire.

Source: http://blog.chinesehour.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/traditional_wedding.jpg; http://www.chinatownconnection.com/images/chinese_wedding340.jpg

The Wedding Day

In a traditional Chinese wedding, there are five rituals that define this day. The first is the bride's departure. The bride will be fully attired from head to toe in classical Chinese red as she prepares to leave home. When the groom's entourage arrives at the bride's home, she is taken away in a curtained sedan chair made of bamboo. The bride is carried onto the sedan chair by the matchmaker so that her feet would not touch any evil spirits on the ground. Once the bride leaves the house she could not return until the third day after the wedding rites and be accompanied by her husband. On the tenth day and thereafter, she can return by herself without her husband.

The second ritual is the bride's arrival. Traditionally, when the bride arrived at the groom's home, firecrackers were lit to ward off any evil spirits. Before the sedan chair is set down it has to pass over a hot pot of charcoal to burn away any evil spirits. Then the chair is set down and the bride steps out and over a saddle, a symbol of stability.

The third Chinese wedding ritual is the wedding altar. Traditionally, the Chinese matrimonial rites included a red sash to signify the union of the couple. The couple will walk to the altar each holding an end of the red sash. At the altar is where the fourth ritual takes place, paying respects to the family. At the altar the newlyweds will honor the groom's family ancestors by bowing three times at their home altar. Finally, the last ritual is the tea ceremony, where the couple serves tea to family members in descending order, from the oldest to the youngest: grandparents, parents, aunts, uncles, and older married siblings. During this ceremony, the couple kneels on pillows and offers tea with two hands to their grandparents and parents. Tea is then served to the other elders standing up. In return, each elder offers a wedding present of jewelry or lai see (red envelope of lucky money). This ends the ceremony which marks the beginning of the wedding banquet.

Source: http://library.thinkquest.org/C004203/social/chinese.jpg; http://www.chinapictures.org/images/chinese-wedding/1/chinese-wedding-40722180035855.jpg; http://english.people.com.cn/200505/16/images/0515_B67.jpg; http://library.thinkquest.org/06aug/00844/images/hongkong.jpg

Modern Chinese Wedding

Today, most of the traditional Chinese marriage customs and rituals has either conformed to modern day standards or totally vanished. With the change in society, a lot of these obsolete traditions have been totally abandoned by modernism. Though some rural parts of China might still hold on to these traditions, most modernized and westernized cities in China have transformed these traditions to fit today's lifestyle.


In modern day China, the idea of free love is more acceptable, eliminating the idea of arranged marriage against the couple's will. Though arranged marriage is still an ongoing activity but the couple is not forced to comply if the match is not suitable, as in old China. For the most part, China today has adopted the westernized ideology of free marriage with whoever you choose to be with.

Source: http://www.chinapictures.org/photo/people-life/chinese-wedding/40722180207866/

Combining the Old with the New

Today, the Chinese marital customs has changed, in a sense, to adapt to the modern lifestyle. The essences of the traditions still remained the same but the execution of these rituals might take on another form.
The matchmaking of couples are still practiced today but not to the extent of the past. Today, the couples are still being introduced through a relative or dating services, but the matching of the astrology signs, birthdates, and family backgrounds are not taken to the same degree of consideration as in the past. Couple's have more freedom, today, on who they choose to marry and the superstitions of matching of astrology signs are not that big of an obstacle as it once was. This information is merely a reference just to look at as a form of a ritual rather than an underlying marriage requirement.

Planning a Chinese Wedding Today

In today's society, China has adopted the westernized ideology of the wedding planning process, but with the Chinese traditions added on. Like any modern day wedding planning process, everything is planned either by the couple or a professional wedding planner. The process includes picking the date, location, wedding attire, caterer, etc. Usually a more cultured couple will hold a banquet in a Chinese seafood restaurant to recreate the environment of a traditional wedding banquet at the groom's house, with all families and friends. More westernized couple might hold the banquet in a hotel banquet hall.
The bride's dowry tradition is still practiced today, in the form of jewelry and gifts from relatives and family. It's like a going away present from the family to the bride, something she can take with her and bring her fortune once she marries. Everything the bride takes with her to her husband's house is considered part of the bride's dowry.

Modern Wedding Attire

Fashion has always been a big part of modern day weddings. The type of dress a bride can wear is endless. The fashion industry has done a good job in blending modern with traditional, there are many ideas of dress that combines the modern white gown with the traditional red silk Chinese hong qua.

In a modern day Chinese wedding, the bride usually supports both types of dress; the modern white gown during the wedding ceremony, today usually held in a church or any other venue, and the traditional red silk hong qua at the banquet.
For the groom, they no long support the traditional black silk robe with the red sash and the round black hat with a red tassel. The groom's attire has totally conformed to the modern day wedding attire, which is a tuxedo of various colors and design.

Source: http://www.bridalprom.com/wedding_dresses/USA/STYLE%20LB360773-F.jpg

http://www.brighton.virtualmuseum.info/exhibitions/images/guyu_wedding_dress.jpg

Modern Wedding Day

Most of the five rituals of a traditional Chinese wedding are pasted on to modern weddings. The bride's departure is one of the rituals keep by the Chinese culture but with a modern twist. In today's wedding, the bride no long get picked up by a sedan chair carried by people but rather a limousine. A modern twist to this ritual is before the groom's entourage can pick up the bride, they are halted at the door by the bridesmaid. At this point, the groom is at the totally mercy of the bridesmaid because he will have to do, whatever they say, or else he could not pick up the bride. Usually the bridesmaid will test the groom's sincerity by telling him to do ridiculous things such as push-ups, bark like a dog, etc. At the end, the groom will have to pay lucky money to the bridesmaid, usually in the amount containing all nines (“nine” is a Chinese synonym for “everlasting”), in order to successfully pick up the bride.

After the groom picks up the bride, the couple will go directly to the wedding ceremony site and the ceremony will begin, instead of the traditional sedan chair arrival with stepping over the coal. The ceremony at the wedding altar is no long just bowing down to the family and ancestor, but a westernized service is performed by a minister. The bride walks down the aisle with her father then handing her off to the groom at the altar.

The ritual of paying respects to the elders through the tea ceremony is still very popular in modern Chinese weddings. Before the banquet, the bride and groom will kneel down and offer tea to all of their elders in descending order. After this ceremony the banquet officially begins usually serving traditional Chinese cuisines.
Source:http://www.sgtowns.com/journal/dailypics/teaceremony.jpg; http://www.kasal.com/images/rr/feat/feat56b.jpg

Conclusion

The Chinese culture is very rich in everyway. It is great to see these traditions and rituals evolve their way into modern society. Even in the United States, Chinese-American is beginning to understand the importance of culture and actually practice most of these traditions in their weddings. Hopefully these traditions be pasted on to the future and not become extinct or forgotten.

Bibliography

Gong, Rosemary. Good Luck Life:The Essential Guide to Chinese American Celebrations and Culture: New York, 2005.

Gunde, Richard. Culture and Customs of China: Westport, Connecticut, 2002.

Chan, Sucheng. Chinese American Transnationalism: The Flow of People, Resources, and Ideas between China and America during the Exclusion Era: Philadelphia, 2006.